SUBJECT: DEPLOYMENT OF VOWELS TO BOSNIA

MG Pat Stevens,

I recommend that the Corps of Engineers (COE) deploy 75,000 vowels to the war torn region of Bosnia. The deployment, which would be largest of its kind in American history, will provide the region with the criticaily needed letters A,E,I,O and U, and would render countless Bosnian names more pronounceable. It would more than make up for the bridge fiasco.

For six years, we have stood by while names like Ygrjvslhv and Tzlynhr and Glrm have been horribly butchered by millions around the world.The United States must finally stand up and say "Enough." It is time the people of Bosnia finally had some vowels in thelr incomprehenslble words. The COE should lead the crusade in this noble endeavour.

I recommend the deployment be dubbed Operation Vowel Movement by the COE and be set for early next week, with the Adriatic port cities of Sjibbdnzv and Grzny slated to be the flrst recipients. Two C-130 transport planes, each carrying over 500 24-count boxes of "E's," could fly from Andrews Air Force Base across the Atlantic and airdrop the letters over the cities.

Citizens ot Grzny and Sjbvdnzv are in critical need of the vowels.

Trszg Grzdnjkln, 44; said. "I have six children and none of them has a name that is understandable to me or to anyone else. America, please send my poor, wretched family just one E Please. My God I don't think we can last another day."

Sjlbvdnzv resident Grg Hmphrs, 67, said, "With just a few key letters, I could be George Humphries. This is my dream."

This airdrop would represent the largest deployment of any letter to a foreign Country since 1984. During the summer of that year, the US shipped 92,000 consonants to Ethiopia, providig cities iike Ouaouoaua, Eaoiiuae, and Aao with vital, life-giving supplies of L's, S's end T's.

Hope you can pull this off Pat, it is badly needed!

Sincerely,

Hermie O. Mastenfeldt III

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