Health Questions with PsYcHo NuRsE Please keep in mind that PsYcHo NuRsE gives out information that is not actually health related. The authors of this shacklet take no responsibility for any injuries or illnesses caused by any persons taking the advice of PsYcHo NuRsE. Repeat: this advice is strictly for humor purposes.......dumbass ! To contact PsYcHo NuRsE simply put your name, address, phone number, and the account number of any major credit card on a 3 X 5 card and send it to: PsYcHo NuRsE, OU-812 Uvula Blvd, Nalgas Partidas, NM 80124

Dear Psycho Nurse, I recently caught my husband screwing one of our barnyard animals from behind. I was completely amazed and asked him to see a therapist. He says that it's no one's business who (or what) he has sex with. I found this disturbing because we're Republican...what do I do? Tessie in Cucillo Dear Tess, It's my opinion that most men will just stick their you know whats in whatever remotely looks like it will fit in, however, your husband does need to see a therapist about his problem. He's not alone though, I've seen cases where men have gotten their you know whats stuck in bottles, cans, a garden hose, orthodontic braces (while the owner was wearing them) and a weight for a dumbell. As for being Republican I have no idea how to help you. Psycho Nurse Dear Psycho Nurse, I'm a 22 year old nymphomaniac and I really don't like the way a condom feels inside me. What should I do? Bareback in Roswell Dear Bareback, Promise me that you'll have sex only with stupid people who don't know WHY you should NEVER have unprotected sex! No, not really. . . you should reconsider your ideas until you've found a partner that you care enough about to remain monogamous with. Failing that, Playboy Forum in the January 97 issue reports a liquid latex condom invented by a Vienesse body painter. Apparently, the condom is painted on with a brush and comes in several different colors. I wonder if you can sculpt it? Five gallons please!

Dear Psycho Nurse, My little sister's head spins around when my parents aren't looking. What should I do? Pablo in Las Cruces Pablito, Pay no attention to her. Little sisters are always trying to get attention like that She's jealous because she already knows that males are superior NOT! There is nothing you can do, unless you believe in the devil, then you might want to accidently "spill" some holy water on her in front of a priest then stand back and watch the fireworks! Dear Psycho Nurse, I've been reading all the latest novels regarding viruses and the increasing danger of plague breaking out (The Hot Zone, The Coming Plague, etc.) and I was wondering if I should really worry about viruses? Scared in Santa Fe Dear Scared, Give me a friggin break! I've been to Santa Fe . . . all you folks do is booze and coke it up, then bitch about how meaningless your life is as you're popping another Prozac. You've got so many chemicals accumulated in your body since high school that your last name should be Dupont. You should be honored if a deadly virus invades your body! Actually that's not true, there are a bunch of nice people in Santa Fe, but they're too worried about day to day survival and making enough money to pay the high property taxes caused by rich whiners like yourself. Just keep up to date on your shots! Health Tip of the Month Around this time of year it's always useful to review safe meat handling procedures. Remember that various organisms can grow rapidly on exposed meat. Always wash meat that has been left out for more than two days with bleach before eating it.

[ Nurses Guide | Join Nursey's Waiting Room Web Ring! ]
[ HeadMap | Waiting Room | Magazine Rack | Bulletin Board | Site Awards | WebRings | My Friends ]
[ "Ask PsYcHo NuRsE" | About Nursey | PsYcHo NuRsE's Padded Room | Nursing Links | Sign my Guestbook ]