TAKING CARE OF GRANDMA

TAKING CARE OF GRANDMA

      People say children should act their age. Shouldn't old people have to act their age also? Sounds silly? Take the case of my grandmother, she is the mother of my father. He's old, and she is even older.
      I'll explain: we really wanted to take care of grandma. After she retired, all of us, my parents, my aunts and uncles and me, had a meeting and planned all the things we would do. My dad found her a cute little apartment near the Senior Citizen's Center. Later mom asked her how she thought she'd like it. Grandma answered, "Why should I go there? That's for old people. I don't want to spend my time with a bunch of old people." Mom threw up her hands and mentioned how my other grandmother loved her Senior Citizen's Center.
     Aunt Louise told her about the free movies for retired people. That was no better, because, grandma said, "Free movies! Who wants to watch old movies about a pretend life! As long as I draw a breath I plan to live life--in my own way." Aunt Louise threw up her hands, too.
     It was obvious to even us grandchildren, that if we are to be honest, we'd have to admit our family had failed grandma--completely.
     Naturally, we lived expecting calamities each moment, all kinds of things could happen to an old lady. It was years before we grandchildren learned to hold our breath and wait. She said, "If I need help, I'll ask. I've made it this long I expect to make it a bit longer." That makes more sense to me now, but then I only knew I liked my grandmother and I didn't want her neglected.
      It did no good to appeal to dad. He'd just laugh, and listen, but he'd not do a thing. She got the idea that she needed to go to Argentina to do her bit in the service of God. We tried to reason with her and to stop her from going to Argentina. We appealed to Dad, but he said: "No need to try and stop her, if she's made up her mind. She'll do it. Mom's always been that way, and at this stage in her life she's not going to change."
      "What if something terrible happens?" we asked.
      "To whom? Your grandmother or to Argentina?" Dad said. Then he laughed and laughed and laughed. We never understood that, if one of us had been about to go to Argentina--or anywhere--he'd have put up a bangaroo of a fuss. We knew that when it came to grandma it was a different story. He was going to let her do it.
      Grandma got away with anything. One night, just after dinner, a car stopped out in front. I was near a window so I looked out. It wasn't grandma's car and she wasn't driving, some strange man as.
     I watched and saw him lean over and kiss my grandmother!
      She didn't even slap him, as she'd told me to do if some stranger tried to take liberties with me. She didn't try to knee him, nor struggle, nor scream. She just let him kiss her! After he'd taken liberties, this man, probably even older than grandma, got out of the driver's side and walked around the car. Next, he opened the car door for her. I watched grandma put out her hand--as if she was hurt, or something--and he helped her out of the car. He even kept his arm around her as he closed the door.
      Knowing grandma and her independent ways I was sure she'd been terribly hurt in an accident. In our family we don't need strangers to take care of our grandmother, we take care of her, so I rushed outside to help her. She saw me, but she said, to this stranger, not me, "This is one of my grandchildren I have been telling you about," That masher reached over and ruffled my hair and before I could fell him on the spot he said something like, "Glad to meet you. From what Sue's been telling me, I'll bet we have lots of things we'll enjoy together."
     Before I could tell him to unhand me, and that grandma hadn't told me a thing about him, my dad shook his hand and asked him to come into our house.
      From then on things really were crazy. My dad told me to take the man's coat and hang it up. My mother asked if they'd like a cup of coffee and then she served it in her very best cups--with real cream. Every one acted so strange--like the time Uncle Ted brought his girl friend over to introduce her and ask us to their wedding.
      My dad and the old masher discussed the weather, then the news and finally politics. I watched my dad and I knew he was having a difficult time. My dad has a very different sense of humor. When something is funny to him he sorta blows out and up, his face gets red and his cheeks puff up. After a while he starts to rock in his chair--not a rocking chair, but he rocks. He has a lot of problems being proper. (My mother says he takes after my grandmother.) My mother knew he was about to explode, so she asked this old eager masher if he would like to look at her flowers? Evidently the masher knew he couldn't be fresh with my mother so he behaved and went outside to look at the flowers. I went along--just in case.
      When we returned my grandmother had "that look" and my father seemed okay. His face was almost normal color, only his eyes were all crinkled and sparkley, he gets like that when he's up to mischief.
      My dad said, "I understand you have asked my mother to be your wife." The masher grinned as big as a man that old could grin and said, "I'm happy to say she has accepted. I certainly hope you have no objections."
      Do you know what my dad said? He said, "Usually my mother is a good judge of character, and for sure she usually makes up her own mind about what she is going to do, so let's say we'll take this under advisement and see how it works out." I couldn't believe my ears. If my mother or I had come in with an announcement like that he'd have raised the roof. However, with grandma he was as meek as could be.
      You've probably guessed, grandma did marry that masher that I now call grandpa Harry, and to tell the truth, we have had lots of fun together. I guess he wanted to get married because he was so old and lonely. My grandmother probably wanted to be nice and help him so she agreed to marry him and be his companion, and listen to his stories. She evidently had stories to tell him too. They certainly had a lot to tell each other. Every time I see them he is talking, and she is listening or she is talking and he is listening. They laugh and act as if they enjoy the things they are talking about.
       Now, guess what! He's taking her to Argentina. They're both going to help the world. Bet he'd never thought of Argentina until grandma talked about it.