D I N I N G
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C E L E B R A T I O N

At the Dining-In we meet formally as gentlemen and Comrades-In-Arms to strengthen the fraternal bonds which unite us as Non-Commissioned Officers of the United States Air Force, Strategic Air Command, and the 4000th Support Group.   I personally consider the Dining-In to be significant to the traditions of the Air Force and especially to this Detachment.   This year we are celebrating our fifth anniversary, and we are holding our first Dining-In. I would like to see an all out effort on the part of all NCOs to make this an annual affair.

The Dining-In as we know it today is the natural evolution and modernization of tradition cloaked in the mysteries of Anglican monastic living.   History leads us to believe that after the tradition of the Dining-In originated in the early English Monasteries, it spread quite naturally to the universities, and was adopted by the Military with the advent of the Officer's Mess.   A credible story is told regarding the origin of the Dining-In as a military function.   The story is placed at an English Army Post in India; the time is the early 1800s.   The Officers assigned lived on the Post and had their own Officers Mess; however, the lure of the local area proved to be more interesting than that of the strictly male Officers Mess.   As a consequence, the Post Commander found himself dining in total solitude most evenings.   In an effort to attract the Officers back to the Post social circle, he decided to institute a program whereby all the Officers would dine together at least once each month.   Not only did they gather thus each month, but it was in full military regalia, and with all the traditional military “Pomp and Ceremony”, to include a Rum Ceremony and a traditional toast to the English Throne.   This appears to be the foundation for our wine drinking ceremony which we are observing tonight, and for the traditional toasts to the Flag and to our higher echelons of Command.   Our widely renowned and highly esteemed General H. H. (Hap) Arnold is traditionally credited with bringing the Dining-In to its present standing in the Air Force, through his famous "Wing-Dings" of the Army Air Corps days.   Further impetus was undoubtedly given to the tradition through the close association of American and British military personnel beginning with World War II and continuing to the present day.   Recognizing that the Dining-In was an ideal vehicle to enhance and perpetuate tradition and ceremony and to increase E'spirit de Corps, the custom has spread from the Officer ranks to the Enlisted grades, and is in fact as much a part of the life of a Non-Commissioned Officer as it has been and still is within the Commissioned Ranks.

The E'spirit de Corps and camaraderie within the units of the 4-Grand were, for the most part, always at high levels; as was the competitive spirit between the units.   The Dinings-In further promoted that spirit and provided a forum for friendly but competitive exchanges, primarily in the form of toasts and awards at the Dinings-In.   Cross visits for official purposes were arranged to coincide whenever possible with a unit's Dining-In such that both Dets and the Group had representatives at each unit's Dining-In.   On my second tour at Det-2 from 1971 thru 1979, I had the opportunity to actively participate in several of the competitive unit award exchanges that took place at various Dinings-In.   Over the years it seemed that each unit worked at topping the previous year's award.   Each unit would take their best shot at the other two and the next year it seemed the ante went up.   It reached the point that, or so it seemed, there was no sacred ground.   We were a relatively small organization, and skeletons were not long for the closet.   A story comes to mind that I'd like to share concerning one of the later Dinings-In of that period.   It was a Dining-In at the Group that occurred in either 1977 or 1978.   I was one of the team members representing Det-2 at the Group Dining-In.   As a team we had racked our brains trying to come up with the "ultimate" award (roast) to present to the Group.   Nothing less than spectacular would do since the Group had done such a thorough job roasting us at the previous year's Dinings-In.   We found ourselves in Omaha the night before the Group Dining-In still with no presentation developed, a grave and serious situation.   Our team met that evening at the NCO club in a do or die session.   Perhaps it was our desperation, or maybe someone "up there" felt sorry for us, but in any case a plan and an angel of rescue emerged.   I can't remember how, but somehow we met up with a lady, Jan, that was endowed with a great sense of humor and enough of a mischievous spirit to join our desperate crew in planning the "coup de grace" of Dining-In awards.   That evening, using Govt. pens and bar napkins, we drafted the outline for the "Mother of Awards".   Our willing accomplice and savior, Jan, agreed to attend the Group Dining-In and help us in presenting the award, all for just the price of a new dress to wear at the function.   Needless to say we were more than happy to pay for the new dress.   The next night at the Dining-In that dress more than paid for itself.

The theme of our award was to bring certain of the more colorful (and senior) Group members up to the podium (in front of all the Group Dining-In attendees), line them up, and make the presentation.   We called them forward, arranged them in a line, and began the presentation with a story to the Group concerning how we at the Det had been ravaged in the past by these very gentlemen in the form of various Group inspection visits.   We went on to explain how it was not only us, but more than a few of the local Aroostook County females who were ravaged as well.   I know the guys we had standing up there had no clue at that time as to where this award was going.   I think they thought we were just going to verbally wire brush them a little and call it good.   No chance.   We went on further to explain that unbeknownst to our award recipients, they had each one, at one time or another, visited themselves upon the same (unfortunate) Loring female.   That got their attention, but nothing like it did when we further explained that we had brought that poor lady with us from Maine so that she could appropriately repay their visits.   On that cue, Jan, in her new dress was escorted by Chuck Minor to the podium and the line of (now very nervous) award recipients.   She stopped in front of each individual and made nice-nice while we read that individual's epitaph.   Then she pinned a large name tag on each that we had previously made up.   Samples of the individual roasts are as follows:   (Jan standing in front of each awardee while we read.)

          Jack Belfry - You remember Jack.   He's the one you said was so straight he wouldn't do it unless all the lights were off, your were both standing up, and you had to tell him you loved him first.   I guess that's why you've nicknamed him the Missionary. (At that point, Jan pinned on Jack's "Missionary" name tag.)

          Carl Schooley is our next man in line.   While on the outside Carl appears to be a pretty quiet and peaceful gent, he can really be a terror.   When a woman goes with Carl, he expects her to wear a blindfold, handcuffs, and a corset and that’s all.   He brings the whip.   I guess that’s why he’s named the Master.

          Lt Col Steve McElroy - Now here is a real surprise.   We all know what a dynamo he is at work, leaving footprints all over those that get in his way.   Well we’ve all got another side.   In his case, he wears the blindfold, handcuffs, and the corset.   The woman brings the whip.   He’s been appropriately named the Slave.

          Ray Thompson - She doesn’t have much to say about him except that he’s one smooth tongued devil.   I guess that about says it all.   That and the name she gave him as Slick.

          Les Gunderson - Here’s the sleeper.   This man’s job is preventive maintenance, and I guess he really believes in prevention.   He always carries some saran wrap and a rubber band, just in case.   She’s rated him 4X.

          George Himes is next.   Here’s a man with no grass growing on his feet.   There’s nothing slow about George.   Maybe that’s why it says here that George is like a small town to a woman.   He’s through before you can blink you eyes.   He’s always had a lot of rabbit in him, and that’s how she’s named him - Rabbit.

          Jim Glaze is last.   Not because he’s the least guilty by any means.   Lord knows the stories about him are enough to bring back the chastity belt.   How much of that reputation is really true, though?   She says that there is an old saying that describes Jim pretty well.   When all is said and done, there’s a lot more said than ever gets done; and that’s why she calls him Softie.

The whole presentation went over better than we could ever have hoped, mostly thanks to our lady assistant and great sport, Jan, who carried our her role perfectly.   She did that in spite of the fact that Jim Glaze practically mugged her when it was his turn and she was in front of him.   The pictures that follow were from that presentation. In my mind it truly was the "Mother of Awards", and was never topped.   Of course, I'm a little partial here.