The PPDRDG Department of Official State Secrets
and Carefully Guarded Information Presents:
A Wikid-Leak Scoop!
Thanks to our mole in the very heart of the Imperial Government in London, we have uncovered a dastardly scheme to destroy the entire energy resources of the peaceful agro-aquatic community of Diego Garcia! Without any consultation with the public, the pseudo-civilian side of Her Majesty the Queen's government, or the inummerable experts who know exactly what you should think about every conceivable subject, despite having never been to the Lesser Dependencies. Suffice it to say that The War Mongers of The Admiralty have devised a blueprint for the complete and total disruption of all peaceful fossil-fuel-powered activities in the Central Indian Ocean!
Found hidden deep inside a nondiscript ledger discovered in the bowels of the Admiralty's notorious and mysterious "archives", our brave freedom fighter comrades uncovered the classified documents we've brought into the light of day in this publication! As can be seen, the Commander-in-Chief of the East India Station has usurpt the power of the Crown itself and unilaterally decided to take matters into his own hands should "war" breakout (euphemisms abound in this cleverly encrypted document).
What will happen to the Peaceful Natives? What
will happen to the Fish of The Sea? What will happen to those who
have already died securing government secrets and underhanded
plots? If we loose coal, we've lost it all! As we all know,
aside from some wonderfully flavorful smoke, coal is the most
environmentally friendly fuel in the world! To deny it to our
brothers and sisters on the islands simply to keep it from falling into
the hands of the likes of Otto von Bismark, The Hun, is ludicrous and
There must be an end to this
deception and deceit! Join us in opposing the Forces of Intrigue,
whether you are disguised as you rumble down the street in your
horseless carriage, or
surreptitiously sneaking around testing for open and unlocked doors and
windows! You job, should you care to accept it, is to carefully
steal, and then conceal from your supervisors,
all the classified documents you can find, regarding any subject, or
any time-line, and send them to us, Wikid-Leaks, East Wing, 6th Floor,
Room 123, McLean, VA, 20102, attn: Anyone Without a Silencer on His
Glock. Remember to mail them in a plain brown envelope, tied
carefully with kite string. . . but, be sure to put your full
name and an address where we can find you at night inside.
Did you note that Mr. Hyde Jekyll signed this nefarious work? It sounds like something that might come out of a mad scientists lab, doesn't it?
Also, did you ever notice that coconut crabs are really just humongous insects of some sort?
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This, and everything else I write and every photo I produce is copyrighted by Ted A. Morris, Jr.