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 WAR STORIES FROM PARADISE
You have traveled back to 2005!
Entries are posted by the year the writer arrived, so be sure to check either side of the year
you're looking for to find your old buddies, shipmates, and sweethearts!

Sep 2005 through Jan 2006
NAME = Mel
MY QUEST = Enjoy remembering the many war stories
VT of a SWALLOW = Depends...Unladen?...African?...European?
E-MAIL = AFMedic1997@yahoo.com
NATIONALITY = American
SERVICE = USAF
UNIT = 96 EBS
RANK/RATE/JOB = SSGT
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = This is a No-Shit Drinking Story
MY WARSTORY = So there we were...having a bar-b-que and partaking in some cocktails on New Year's Eve when a very special friend happened to mention how cool it would be to steal the Santa sled and put it on top of the EOD bar.  Now us B.I.O.T.C.H.'s have no fear so myself and a cop that shall remain nameless at this time decided to take a gator from the CE compound and travel to Liberty Hall.  We drove around to where the sled was and proceeded to load it onto the gator.  There were some maintainers at their wannabe EOD bar tent yelling at us, but we did not falter.  Speeding down the dirt road we delivered it to the EOD bar and many took pictures with it.  What was left to do you might ask.  Put it on the roof!  A few less drunk individuals hoisted it to the roof and those that were not weak climbed the roof to sit in the sled and bring belated Christmas cheer.  I do remember a few days later the 40 AEG commander ended up coming down to the EOD bar and quite enjoyed the sight of the sled on top of the bar.
 

Oct-2005-jan 2006
NAME = Moose McGilacutty
MY QUEST = To find the nude beach
VT of a SWALLOW = African or European?
E-MAIL = shannonj2600@hotmail.com
NATIONALITY = U S of A
SERVICE = Air Farce
UNIT = Security Farces
RANK/RATE/JOB = E-5 then E-6 now.
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = This is a No-Shit Drinking Story
MY WARSTORY = So there I was me and my buddies shit faced at the Brit Club and apparently there was some big to do on the Navy side and all these Navy females show up wearing gear I didn't think was esential to a GWOT deployment,but i digress. Did I mention I was shit faced,anyway these navy chics are sitting at a table on the outside deck in dresses too short to ignore and one of them keeps opening her legs and of course in all the haste to pack her slutty gear she must have forgotten to pack panties. So being the hard up shitfaced Air Farce Gaurdsmen we are we looked and pointed and took pictures. Well needfless to say this enraged the Navy seamen who were apparently charged with protecting the pantyless wonders honor. My buddies and I not possesing the refined social graces of our regular Air Force counterparts informed the seaman that only pain and humiliuation awaited them if that continued down their current path. needless to say they continued but before we could dole out there ass whoopins Andy the rather large customs official,bar manager and freind of OURS tossed the offending seamen out on there asses. The night was finished with another round of Captain(on the house) and some BBq meat on a stick sold by the phlipinos at the door. True story so help me and I challenge anyone who calls me a lier . I was saddened to learn recently that the Air Guard would no longer deploy to DG I'll miss it.

2005
NAME =  aka "Barbie"
MY QUEST = live everyday as if it's my last VT of a SWALLOW = Swallow what?
E-MAIL = not this time bucko
SERVICE = Air Force
UNIT = 715AMOC
RANK/RATE/JOB = SMSgt
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = This is a No-Shit Drinking Story MY WARSTORY = So there I was with Tisha at the Brit Club after a most difficult Cable and Wireless Challenge.  We began to celebrate (with the Brits)and one thing let to another and a naked couple were in the water in front of the Marina doing 'it'.  I won't say who but it was...quite interesting.

Needless to say the PR on Monday was not good.
 

June 2005 - June 2006
NAME = Trish
MY QUEST = Repair my liver after a year of Diego!
VT of a SWALLOW = Does that have something to do with the transexuals?
E-MAIL = Spam makes me twitch...
NATIONALITY = American
SERVICE = Active Air Force
UNIT = 715 AMOG that switched to 730 AMS and will probably switch back to 715th soon...
RANK/RATE/JOB = I found out I made Staff Sergent while I was there.  That was pretty cool.
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = This is a No-Shit Drinking Story
MY WARSTORY = So, me and my boss (we'll call her "Barbie") were shit hammered at the Brit (we are both female type, so of course we were shit hammered) when the Camp Justice 1st Sergent (who ironically looks like a part of the male anatomy with ears) strolls up to us and tells us we need to leave because it is past cerfew.  (In case you dont know, AMC personnel on the island don't have a cerfew, but Camp Justice folks had a cerfew of 0001L.)  Of course, the 11 or 12 double Morgans and Cokes totally disagreed with this particular 1st Sergent and he ended up threatening to put us in jail if we didn't leave the Brit IMMEDIATLY!!  Well, "Barbie" proceeded to "challenge" the authority of the Shirt and it turned into a war of the stripes!  (Me not having any stripes to speak of, found this highly entertaining)  Well, one thing let to another and "Barbie" gave the 1st Sergent a good, solid shove to the chest area...  Not good...  The 1st Sergent went straight to his office and called our Major and told on "Barbie" because she pushed him.  (Note:  Its about 0130 and we are all pretty shitty)  The Major showed up at the Brit Club and requested that we not push anymore Senior ranking enlisted members and then made the 1st Sergent apologize to us for threatening to take us to jail for not doing anything wrong.
     Long story short, drunk chicks can get away with anything on the island of Diego Garcia!!  I will never forget my tour there and I had the time of my life!!!  I miss my girls and I miss the completely ridiculous British dress-up parties.  I love nekid Brits!!!!  hahaha
 
 

On my way sometime this month (damn OPSEC
NAME = mugu
MY QUEST = To have a war story woth posting when I'm done
VT of a SWALLOW =  swallow? Isn't that the bird of love
E-MAIL = mugu@yahoo.com:boniface30@hotmail.com
NATIONALITY = togo lome
SERVICE = Air Farce ( A stinkin Guardsmen)
UNIT = 40th
RANK/RATE/JOB = SSgt (E-5)
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = Want to Drink A Lot, Cheap
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = There I Was, Passed Out on The Beach
MY WARSTORY = mugu keep offfffffffffffffffffffff.......they give me hope that my time ther won't be spent walkin wing tips durring the day and pud pulling at night( or vice versa). If anyone can fill me in on the Air Force contingent on the Island Likes,Dislikes general mood ect. it would be greatly appreciated. As I mentioned before I'm in the Air guard in Jerzy and the last time I deployed was to Quatar in 2002-03 so can't imagine DG is any worse than that,as long as there are no porta poties that have been roasting in 120 Deg heat I'll be fine. Anyways thanks for the Forum great site.
 
 

February to May 2005
NAME = Steve Tuohy
MY QUEST = To drink in as many nations as possible
VT of a SWALLOW = african or european?
E-MAIL = tsltuohy@aol.com
NATIONALITY = USA - Irish New Yorker
SERVICE = Air National Guard
UNIT = Security Forces
RANK/RATE/JOB = SSgt and still SSgt (finished 7 level CDCs). Heading to Kyrgastan in a month. I hear that's great too.
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = Other
MY WARSTORY = I got to Diego on the heels of a stressful year. Family problems, some bills and I had broken my leg at tech school (only the brilliant medical personnel at Lackland told me I had strained my knee. After I drove from Texas to northern Minnesota using a crutch to work the gas pedal, I got an MRI and was told my leg was broken. It was too late to cast it so it took 4 months to heal instead of 2. Diego was just what the doctor ordered. It takes about 5 days to get used to the heat. The island is beautiful and everyone has this laid back 'wow, I'm really here' attitude. Beer is $12 a case and you can buy 2 cases a day - but that's it - only 2 cases. My tent and my friend's tent had a combined total of 22 cases of beer. We lived in tent city which was nice for a tent city. Remember an Air Force Tent city is better then some 3rd world nations' hotels. The fishing was great - crazy great. My first charter was a 4
hour bottom fishing trip off the coast of the plantation. It takes about 30 minutes by boat to get there (1 hour round trip) so you fish for 3 hours. We caught 50 fish in 3 hours. We lost tons of tackle because the groupers run under the coral after you hook them and snap the line. The action was non-stop.
     The scenery was amazing. We had dolphins follow us out. You could watch shark swim under the boat. If you go trolling you hit yellow fin tuna and wahoo. The wahoo run 20 - 55 pounds and the tuna run 40 to 150lbs. The biggest I saw was 95lbs and it was huge. The fish taste great. We were tight with the Philippino workers and they would have big cook outs with the fish. Best sea food I've ever had. There are 4 clubs on the Island. The Britt club which sucks, the Seaman's club which was great (the merchant marines go there so you meet people from all over the world and it has this corner bar feel to it - great snack food during happy hour and the kabobs rock.)and the Navy clubs. The Navy has a really nice facility. There is a complex with a sports bar, a dance club and a resturaunt and it's all excellent. We would go to the pool. Swim for a couple of hours, hit the resturaunt and then shoot pool until the band started playing.
     After work, I'ld go to the gym and then swim in the lagoon until the sunset over the palm trees. I used to be in the Army. The 101st Airassualt - Screaming
Eagles. Our deployments sucked. You would loose lots of weight, be frozen or so hot that you couldn't think. There were blisters, bug bites, infections, sore
backs and shoulders from the rucks and gear and no sense of it ending.I have seen the light and it started in Diego. Now I'm going to Kyrgastan. I read an
article on Manas, Kyrgastan (the Air Base)and a Marine Capt said he had heard about the down range Air Force deployment area and how they were know for their 'comfort' but this place is a resort. I know Captian, I understand. I have been converted. Hopefully, we'll meet and have some home grown vodka. My wife still remembers the 101's deployments and field exercises when I would come home stiff, sore and down to skin and bones. Now I come home with a tan line, exotic gifts and a need to sleep it off.
P.S. I'll go back to Diego in a heart beat
 

October 2005-January 2006
NAME = Judson
MY QUEST = I sek the mystical MOJO formula
VT of a SWALLOW = DEpends
E-MAIL = Shannonj2600@hotmail.com
NATIONALITY = American
SERVICE = Air Nasty Guard
UNIT = Security Forces
RANK/RATE/JOB = SSgt E-5
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = Want to Drink A Lot, Cheap
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = I'd Like to Share Precious Memories of Drinking/Fishing/Snorkeling/Sailing on Diego Garcia
MY WARSTORY = I have to say I though DG was pretty good duty I mean I could have been in Iraq. Instead I was enjoying the warm breezes and unfreindly
glances from Dis enchanted Air force women who were thrilled with the Female to male ratio and often took full advantage(who wouldn't).I remember deep sea fishing within sight of the beach by the Navy acey deucy club and landing two 35 lb yellowfin tuna. I also will never forget striking out horribly with a female customs officer at the Brit and how hott ROPO 8 Nikki was. In short I would go back in a heart beat, but not for more than 6 months at a time.
 

July-August 2005
NAME = Pat / Radio Call Sign "FedEx"
MY QUEST =
VT of a SWALLOW =
E-MAIL = pjofedex1@comcast.net
NATIONALITY =
SERVICE = Pa Air Guard
UNIT = Transportation
RANK/RATE/JOB = My Last Big Adventure
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = Other
MY WARSTORY = How I Spent My Summer Vacation 05
Well, there was me, this tropical paradise, the lagoon, my porch, my hammock and my good "ole buddie" Captain Morgan... and of course the Red Light District (porch) of Ben and his gang...& Kat and her following, from Spang-gol-lum, Germany...
Thanks for the Memories <> You know who you are <> lol <>
 
 

On my way sometime this month (damn OPSEC)
NAME = S. Judson
MY QUEST = To have a war story woth posting when I'm done
VT of a SWALLOW = A swallow? Isn't that the bird of love
E-MAIL = shannonj2600@hotmail.com
NATIONALITY = American
SERVICE = Air Farce ( A stinkin Guardsmen)
UNIT = 40th SFS
RANK/RATE/JOB = SSgt (E-5)
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = Interested World Citizen
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = Other
MY WARSTORY = I haven't been to DG yet but my time is fast approaching. Had a great time reading the war stories, they give me hope that my time ther won't be spent walkin wing tips durring the day and pud pulling at night( or vice versa). If anyone can fill me in on the Air Force contingent on the Island Likes,Dislikes general mood ect. it would be greatly appreciated. As I mentioned before I'm in the Air guard in Jerzy and the last time I deployed was to Quatar in 2002-03 so can't imagine DG is any worse than that,as long as there are no porta poties that have been roasting in 120 Deg heat I'll be fine. Anyways thanks for the Forum great site.
 
 

Apr 02-Jul 02, Aug 03-Oct 03, Jan 05-Feb 05, Mar 05-Apr 05
NAME = Bart
MY QUEST = To NOT visit the island again
VT of a SWALLOW = If it's terminal then the Swallow doesn't really care
E-MAIL = aftiggerintel@yahoo.com
NATIONALITY = USA
SERVICE = Air Force
UNIT = 45 ERS
RANK/RATE/JOB = Too low to matter
MY INTEREST IN DG IS = My Time There is Lost in an Alcoholic Haze, Help Me Remember!
SUBJECT OF MY STORY: = I'd Like to Share Precious Memories of Drinking/Fishing/Snorkeling/Sailing on Diego Garcia
MY WARSTORY = The first time I was at DG, it was monsoon season and the old style tent flooded. Right outside the tent we had Lake Placid (I still think a couple chickens drowned in it). Most of the time there was either on the beach, drinking with the Squadron, or trying to figure out how to modify the tent. One night on my trip in Jan 05, we tried to play football on the coral "grass" in the back of tent city. As you can imagine there were several poeple who were bruised and battered after that. My last trip there, we had squadron drinking nights. We'd all start drinking about the same time and instead of whoever passes out first getting drawn on, we drew on anyone who would let us. I think the offical count was 22 people with something written on them by the next morning. That trip we had 2 of our squadron who drank for about 48 hours straight. Man I wish I could keep up with them. Maybe if I get enough practice I can :)
 
 

Subject:         Joining the DGYC
Date:             Mon, 3 Oct 2005 06:20:38 -0400
From:            "Sarah" <sarah_flyinrugger@msn.com>
Hello Mr. Morris!
     I am in the Air Force and was just deployed to Diego Garcia for a 60 day rotation, and thoroughly enjoyed everything the marina had to offer!  I wanted to become a life time member of the DG Yacht Club, however, most of the times I was there, no one was available to take my application.  Do you know if there is a way for me to apply from here in Tampa, either online or through snail mail, and if so, who should I contact?  Thanks very much for your help!
v/r
Captain Sarah Lynch
Sarah - See the DGYC page for the latest on how to accomplish your goal...